The Nonsensical Journal

I Can Hear it Plotting…

Imagine time existing outside of a watch, or smartphone since that’s probably what almost everyone now uses for keeping time … so imagine time existing outside of any time keeping contraption, and it no longer has a ‘physical’ property that we can associate it with… it’s very difficult for me to imagine time in that sense, I understand it… kind of… maybe… probably not… but I just can’t imagine the concept…

They say that if inhabitants of a neighboring galaxy were to be observing us right now, even as I type this at the very moment (which is now, which is already gone as I type this, so its… the past… anyway… ) if they were observing us at this very moment they would probably be seeing Dinosaurs roaming around… And they wouldn’t be coincidentally viewing a Jurassic Park rerun on a drive through cinema screen… this very moment they are viewing prehistoric earth, while we exist right now here…

Prehistoric… like before history was even conceived, that’s some seriously old shit… it’s still history though, just not… history…

So in a weird way I am occupying the past and the future at the same time… it’s too much for my brain to fathom at the present moment… My brain is already overwhelmed with its perpetual due diligence of maintaining my survival as I daydream and drive… there it is in my skull monitoring traffic and calculating complex physics equations, making sure that the idiot day dreaming behind the steering wheel doesn’t go flying off the highway ramp…

Mind you, I would have no hope of understanding most of these equations even if they were somehow intravenously pumped into me, and by most I mean all…

Sometimes I worry my brain will hold my mind for ransom to amuse itself. I have no control over this biological entity that controls everything, including this ridiculous apprehension of it taking me hostage… it interprets my entire existence for my daily convenience; what if on a particularly mundane day it decides to misinterpret everything around me just to see how I would react… my mind, which probably my brain makes me believe is mine, is at the mercy of this malevolent bastard…

They recently found out that flies might be interpreting time at a completely different rate than us, its… faster… like The Flash except they’re small, filthy, extremely annoying and completely useless against super-villains; which explains why it’s a bitch to kill one… it’s like they see it happen before it happens, we’re just slow simple giants to them…

What if my brain decides to slow down or fast forward its interpretation of time around me, what if it decides to ignore it completely? Why is time so annoying?

This is ‘reality’… I can share the same physical space and time with another organism but how fast things occur differ to both of us… in a sense we are both occupying the same space at different times; and we casually call this reality. This is anything but reality, this is… I don’t know what this is but it’s unnecessary, life is complicated as it is…

As I post this online I will place it fleetingly within the confines of my present before it will be viewed in the future by whoever reads this shit, and then it will respectively move to each persons past at each persons convenient time frame… but… in the future we can revisit this past post to place it transiently in a present that once again comes to be past… of course all this while maintaining its integrity by being in our collective past as residents of this planet… well… depending on which time zone you’re in I suppose…

I mean, it’s already tomorrow here and yesterday in other places… so… moving on… or back… or just stand still for a moment…

The past it seems wins the battle of time; so if you’re in Australia at the moment reading this in the future, you win and we lose… or vice versa, I am not sure on the rules and regulations of time battle; I think it might be something I’m mostly making up…

Completely making up…

This is reality… while I go on about my inane anxiety attempting to understand or make some sense of time, space, or why I’m even here, my brain is currently engaged in nerve wrecking tasks of maintaining biological functions that keep alive, sending signals back and forth, approving and overseeing tasks all while making me believe it is in its altruistic nature to keep me alive; when really all it cares about is keeping itself alive…

Should I find myself in a distressed situation such as drowning for example, my brain will start to shut down functions according to importance of its own survival… That’s the truth, your brain doesn’t give a shit whether you live or die, it cares about surviving and will not hesitate to shut down other major organs just to get those precious resources for itself… plus I always treated my liver like shit…

I’m going to stop talking about this though because I suspect that it’s catching on that I’m catching on…

This is what we call reality. An infinite universe with planets, solar systems, and things we cannot even imagine… where possibly everything we have come to know and believe is an absurd fantasy in another distant galaxy or even multiverse… where time and space contort around us as they please all while being a puppet to a piece of grey mush… and we don’t even know if we get to have an answer…

The idealist in me likes to think that maybe we become spirits and we can just drift off into space and the eternal universe to explore, experience and roam around as we please; a final magnificent reward to this existence… it would explain why there aren’t much of them popping around, only the really boring ones stay I suppose… the cynic in me though thinks there is absolutely nothing at the end but being recycled for an astounding blue planet that struggles to keep on and keep up…