The Nonsensical Journal

Let me throw caution to the wind and say whatever is on my mind, would that be so offensive? Who cares? The entire world is offensive to everyone, with the leftists finding the rightists offensive and vice versa, and uppers and downers should be mixed with caution whether to the wind or not… wait what was I talking about?

Climbing down chimneys is rough business

What purpose does the handicapped parking zone serve in a Megamall other than aggravate me? It seems to me that it goes without saying that should you be a handicapped person on your way to a Megamall you would expect a certain amount of… well… rolling… what difference how close or how far from the entrance you are? You’re going to be… well… rolling… ten times the distance, easily…

The bigger the mall, the larger the car park, the more impossible it is to find a parking spot… this is a universal law; one of many subtle hints the universe throws at us to inform us that time and space is an illusion.

Christmas is coming up, and before you know it a pedophile dressed in red will be climbing down chimneys and leaving gifts for the kids… bribes to make sure they stay quiet… Parents spend all year round teaching their children to be wary of strangers and pedophiles, when any dimwitted pedophile in a moment of clarity between alcoholic bouts would realize that walking the streets in a red Santa suit would be much easier… 

I realize that the previous paragraph might be misconstrued as a PSA… Pedophile Service Announcement… but it’s not, I’m just saying Santa is an underdeveloped concept… tell your children you got them the gifts, maybe when they grow up they won’t hastily place you in a retirement home…

In case you’re wondering, I’m not a very festive person… I mean, I do get completely trashed on these occasions, so perhaps that counts as festive, but I am not a “festive” person in the traditional normal sense…  this whole “Tis the season to be jolly” shit irritates me… bitch I’m jolly all year round, can’t you tell by my positive demeanor?…

And this shit doesn’t end does it? But its Christmas… but its Easter… but its new-year… but its Eid… but its Ramadan… but its Hanukah… but it’s throw toxic paint at each other day… and then not satisfied with the quantity of  pious themed celebrations, we add the birthdays, the anniversaries, the pregnancies, and whatever else hallmark prints out for us…

All these occasions so you can dedicate a day to be happy… one day out of your other miserable depressing days that linger in your dismal and dreary existence… Tis the season to be jolly my ass, I still have to go shopping for gifts, and I fucking hate shopping  in those Megamalls with their damn handicapped designated spots…